A Healthy Heart

The Bible speaks a lot about the heart.  The heart is the one organ God is after.  It is the essence of our soul. Anyone can say I love the Lord, but do you love him with your heart? I know at times I would profess I loved the Lord, but my heart knew better.  What an empty feeling that left! As I grow closer to the Lord, I want my heart filled with His love.  I want the love that I had when I gave my heart to the Lord when I was 15 years old.  The scared feeling, relief, and happiness are something I am not willing to give up again. Proverbs 4:23 states, “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”  To me, this verse means, guard your heart, and protect it from everything. I don’t think God said this as a suggestion but rather a command. The journey I am on has wreaked havoc on my heart, but I can say without a doubt as long as I keep my heart healthy and close to the Lord I can survive anything. 

I have thought of a few things I must display to have a healthy heart. Awareness of God: If I am breathing God has a purpose for my life. There is no such thing as coincidence when it comes to God. Everything happens for a reason!  As I struggle with the threat of prison in my head, I know why I am in this place.  I did it! I refused to obey the chances God gave me. He gave me a few humbling moments trying to warn me that I needed to change. I refused to adhere, and I placed myself in a position where all I have is Him.  You know, I am okay with that!

Awe of God: The dictionary defines the word awe as an emotion variously combining dread, veneration, and wonder that is inspired by authority or by the sacred. I don’t think God will tell us we deserve more.  I will tell you God has been so good to me.  A great example is Him giving my life back from alcohol, wrong friends, and unnecessary sinning. This has taken such a load off my shoulders. Not having to worry about what someone is going to say about what I am doing, or worry about creating a lie to cover up my shortcomings. I have never given it much thought, but I now make a concentrated effort to thank God for the things he does for me and my family. I can remember when I was not in God’s favor, I still prayed every day, but the substance of my prayers was things I wanted God to do for me instead of taking the time out thanking him for all the things he has blessed me with in my life. Today, I look for God in all the situations that arise in my life.  Like the old song, “I can face tomorrow because he lives. . .” This is so true.

Assembly with people of God: I have noticed with a healthy heart no one has to beg me to come to church.  As a matter of fact, they don’t even have to invite me because I am the one inviting them. When I was out in the world, I was a proponent of you don’t have to go to church to be close to God. I can watch it on tv, Internet, or better yet have my own version of church. These things are okay when you are physically unable to attend.  It beats the alternative! Today, I associate not going to church as if I was married and never went home. It doesn’t make much sense. What will happen if you get married and look for reasons not to go home?  I submersed myself in work and going to have drinks with my “friends.” Your marriage will not last. I am living proof. When I was not right with God it felt weird going to church on those special occasions. I thought people were staring at me or they were going to talk about me when it was over. Unfortunately, that is probably not far from the truth. I love going to church today. I also listen to podcasts, watch other sermons via the Internet, or stay connected to God through Christian music.

I was thinking about the old monkey saying the other day.  You know hear no evil, speak no evil and say no evil. It relates so well to me guarding my heart because these three parts of our body serve as a direct pipeline to our heart. However, I thought of another one that the monkeys left out which is my mind. Through my ears, I must guard against what I listen to like music. There is music everywhere from commercials to the radio that can have a direct impact on my heart.  I know when I listen to other genres of music I start to change.  I see small tendencies to stray from God. I used to think that was a big fallacy. But, since I have submersed myself into wanting to be a better Christian I have noticed the effects it has on my heart. Think about it most songs outside of Christian cover topics such as cheating, heartache, drinking, guns, violence, and the list goes on.  I want my heart to be healthy and the only way I can do that is to listen to Christian music. I was working the other day at a home pressure washing and I wanted to listen to Marty Rayburn from Shenandoah. He is an acquaintance of mine and for those that probably don’t know he is a pastor. I listened to several songs, and I just felt guilty. I had to switch back to my “Gospel Playlist” on my phone. It may sound elementary to you, but I must stay close to the Lord. Wouldn’t you know it a little later I was cleaning pavers with a surface cleaner in one hand and my other hand up praising the Lord. If you don’t think my explanation has merit about music. Ask yourself, “What was the angel Lucifer known for during his time in heaven?”  The idea Lucifer was a master musician comes from Ezekiel 28:13. The Bible states, “The workmanship of your timbrels and pipes was prepared for you on the day you were created.” You don’t think he can find his way into your heart? I know he can, and he has infiltrated mine in the past.  I must maintain a healthy heart to stay grounded.  The same can be true for the news and everything else. I can watch Fox news and, in an hour, I am frustrated and mad. I have been on the local news for 3.5 years now and there was a time I let it bother me.  I knew things they were saying weren’t true, but I had no way of telling my side of the story. I was stressed all the time and it affected me and my family. Today, I don’t watch the news. I dont follow any of the want-a-be Facebook page reporters either. They seem to distort the facts more than the local news and I didn’t think that could happen. I have learned to protect my heart by blocking this and other gossip from entering my ears. I see people from time to time that don’t know I have made a change in my life, and they come up talking like I used to, and it makes me feel uncomfortable. Not necessarily the conversation but I gave them a reason to feel comfortable doing it based on my past.  I enabled them to help corrupt my heart.

This leads me to protecting your heart through your mouth. Psalms 19:14 states, “Let the words of my mouth, and the mediation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.” I used to have a dirty vocabulary and it is not something I am proud of admitting.  The tongue is very dangerous, and I have learned so much, especially in my marriage once you say something there is no taking it back. I’m sorry only works for the first 100 times! After a while, it doesn’t mean anything. I still struggle at times, but I do bite my tongue more and take time to think before I say something. 

My eyes can affect my healthy heart. What I allow my eyes to view can open an unhealthy gate that begins my downfall. In my previous life, I viewed porn and other social media memes that were unsuitable. I had to testify in court in December, and previous texts I sent were brought up. I was ashamed. Things I thought were funny at one point in my life were put out there for the world to see. I have drastically changed my texting and social media shares even if it is only between me and one other person. I don’t send anything questionable.  Do you ever scroll through social media and something totally off the wall pops up? It seems it happens to me every day. Did you know 71% of young adults and 50% of teenagers come across porn or related material on social media whether they are looking for it or not? This is a problem. Where is our culture heading? The other night at the Grammy’s an artist performed in a manner imitating Satan. I will not even mention his name because it infuriated me so much. I was watching the highlights on my phone, and it made me completely sick to my stomach that someone would have the audacity to mimic Satan. Unfortunately, I know my eyes see things that only create a false reality in my life that damages my heart. 

The last one and the most dangerous in my view is my mind. My mind has four things that can damage my heart. Those include guilt, bitterness, pride, and jealousy. When I speak of guilt, I think I owe you. Have you ever felt guilty?  I do.  I used not to give it a thought.  I used to say, “A conscience is for someone who is weak.”  Guilt tells me that I owe someone something because I have offended them.  The bad thing I have learned about guilt is it robs me of my joy, passion, and worship sometimes.  I have learned the remedy for guilt is confession.  When I am straightforward and honest with people, I take that power away from the situation. God doesn’t want us to feel guilty all the time. It makes us miserable people. John 1:19 states. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. I had to put my transgressions in the blood and seek forgiveness from God. It has taken a tremendous load off my shoulders.

Bitterness is when someone owes me. I have had several people lie about me and the things I did. I have had a bad spirit toward them and what they represent. I have already let the bitterness go toward these people because I have already forgiven them.  I hadn’t forgotten it, but I forgave them. Why should I let someone else take away my happiness and not allow me to worship God with an open mind? It is not constructive. I essentially took them off my hook and put them on God’s hook.

Pride is when I owe myself.  Wow! This hits home.  I felt a sense of pride when I first got indicted. After the sadness, a sense of pride came upon me, and I told myself I don’t deserve to be going through this situation. Have you ever looked at the word PRIDE?  I ask you to focus on the middle letter.  Yep, It is the letter “I”. I am the one that gets myself in trouble, I am the one that does people wrong, and I am the one that didn’t worship God the way I should have. When my world centered around me it was a recipe for disaster. I found focusing on God was my greatest option to change my life.  Then, I started focusing on others around me by volunteering at church and the rescue mission feeding people.  I noticed my heart turned around and my life might not be as busy as it once was, but it has a lot more value.

Jealousy is when I feel God owes me. Yes, I said it! This is when I think and question God why he is better to others than me. Or, he let me get in trouble and allowed others to escape prosecution. Who am I to question why he hasn’t delivered me? I did find the remedy for this jealousy. It was specific praise. God will not do for me if I am not thankful for what he does for someone else.  Moreover, I must be thankful for what he has done for me. God doesn’t owe me anything the reality is He has been better to me than I deserve. I hate that I have caused my family so much pain and I have temporarily altered my professional career. But this situation has caused me to rely on God. He rescued my life, marriage, and my soul.

We all have our demons and issues that arise. It has taken me almost 50 years to corral mine. I needed spiritual heart surgery, and I was blessed to have the ultimate physician on call to perform the surgery. God fixed me and through prayer, bible study, and music, I maintain my healthy heart.