Yesterday was one of my worst days in a very long time. I had to participate in an evidentiary hearing where the defense wanted to make me look horrible to the courts and everyone in attendance. I have done things in my life that I am not proud of and wouldn’t want people to know. There was a time in my life when I really didn’t care about what people thought. However, today I worry more about things I have done in my life that adversely affect my wife and kids. Yesterday the defense attorneys put me in a bad light based on texts I sent to individuals that were crude. I have a off-color sense of humor at times and I have forwarded texts that I did not want brought to light. I have said things I am not proud of as well. However, I am not the same person who texted those messages 3 years ago. Imagine the worst text you ever sent being exposed to the whole world to critique. I lived that nightmare yesterday. They also brought up where I texted about drinking. I thought to myself what a jerk that would use my addiction against me. Does he realize what I went through with alcoholism? Does he care? I am proud of myself to rebuff his line of questioning with I am not that person anymore. I have not drunk alcohol since March 19, 2019, and I rededicated my life to GOD, and I attend church regularly. I am not the person you are trying to describe anymore. I am a new creation. 2 Corinthians 5:17 states, “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” I take ownership of the things I have said and done in the past. As I stated, my greatest worry is the effect it has on my family. The darkness of my past has been brought to light and was distorted at times. I know every light has a shadow. I keep telling myself to let my light shine and maybe the newly created Michael can overcome some of the past. I know people are judging me based on a bad snapshot during my life. That is human nature. However, I would love to welcome them to my life today based on Christ. The last several days have wrecked me and I have worried myself sick. This morning Exodus 14:14 came to my mind. “The LORD shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.” It is hard to lay still while you and your family are being attacked. Yesterday on the stand I felt as if I was the balloon at the carnival and darts was being thrown at me and I was expected to remain still while people tried to penetrate my armor. I want to thank God; he helped me through the grueling 2.5 hours on the stand. It is hard to be still while you know people are making claims that are not true and you have a limited amount of time to try and correct their statements. I was honest with my answers yesterday and I have asked for forgiveness for the things that might have hurt others. I keep telling myself through this humiliation God will give me great humility. I plan on marching toward the light and hope the shadows will fall behind me and GOD will be my treasure. I ask you to pray for me and my family.
I am very proud of you.. you keep holding your head high..
Great example of new beginnings. I love you brother and I’m proud to call you my family.
No one would like their words meant privately, in jest, or by any means laid out for public exhibition, scrutiny, or scorn. It’s like so many things, everyone may have done them, but few are put under such a light.
Which brings me to a valid point, SINCERITY, is a word we use today that is from the Latin phrase sina cera. It means examined by light. Pottery in the olden days was a staple of life. Old pots would break, and get so dirty they could not be used anymore for water, wine, or anything. So new pottery was always being bought. Wise buyers would hold it up to the sun and look inside for lightness that would show thin places or cracks on the inside that may show up later. So sina cera meant it had been examined in the light of day and found to be good.
If you want to know how a person is today, hold them up to the light today and examine them. See their strengths and weakness by what they offer on this day. The past has no relevance in whether they will be strong today. Do not make guesses on character on what could be, judge them in the light of day by what they are in the moment. People are judged daily but judge them fairly. Judge them on what you are seeing now.
I have known this man for 25 years, in two businesses and personal times. Has he made mistakes? Yes. Has anyone else? Yes, we all have. That man cracked, but since, a new man was reborn. Some come to the light and everyone looks only for the cracks and weaknesses. That is human nature I suppose. But when you see a person whose daily life is strong, whose actions are just, who makes amends for wrongs, who is sincere, then grant them justice. They deserve that and so do you. Hopefully, you’ve learned two things today.